FALL AND FAMILY

Fall is a reminder that life brings constant change, issuing challenges to enjoy the moments before they pass.

Today has been an interesting day. 

My kaleidoscope  of thoughts has taken me in many directions. My 8 week creative writing course is done. I learned a lot about writing and even about myself. Our assignment was to write a paper on the theme of sadness using 2-3 different writing genres. I wrote about my great great grandparents and was happy with the result. 

My sister asked what I would write about next and I realized I need to continue writing stories for Our Miraculous Journey which Steve and I began several years ago. We had been chronicling the miracles we have experienced in our lives which we began when one of our younger daughters had asked "what miracles?" in a discussion. We realized that our older children would not know details of some miracles after they moved from home and the younger children would not know details before their birth or when they were very young so Steve and I decided to write them down and give everyone a copy so our family could know their spiritual heritage.

For a few years we would send a few stories every Christmas but when it came time to write about the 80's I just could not! After several attempts and being interrupted by our mission to Australia [jenkinsaustralianmission.blogspot.com] and our family history travels to Europe [furtheradventuresofsteveandliz.blogspot.com] it all got pushed aside. It really is time to move forward but I have come to realize I have some sort of PTSD for those years because they were so hard even with miracles.

Back to this morning. As I lay in bed I was thinking about a couple of experiences with my mother during my growing up years that were really difficult and traumatic. I have been thinking about putting them on paper. I guess these experiences are some of those things I need to take out, deal with and grieve over one at a time before I can let them go. Then, as I lay there thinking about it, into my mind crept some things I inflicted on a couple of my sons and I realized that those things were right up there with what my mother had done to me.  I all of a sudden realized that I need to forgive my mother for that trauma and just put it away. And hope my sons will forgive me if they have not already. I am not sure just what that looks like. But I definitely recognized that I need to forgive.

You would think that was enough epiphanies for one day but then I went to church. Sadly I slept through part of the 1st talk and the violin solo and then all of a sudden woke up as the next speaker was telling about his experiences in Mexico on his mission. He had been in a group of missionaries who were attacked, robbed and held hostage. No one was harmed  but there were harrowing moments. At one point one of the perpetrators asked "Where is your God now?" 

This young man proceeded to talk about how God is always with us but that we need our difficult experiences to grow. He quoted part of Doctrine and Covenants 121 which occurred when Joseph Smith  was incarcerated in Liberty jail under terrible physical conditions, as well as very difficult circumstances for church members. He  asked "O God, where art thou? And where is the pavilion that covereth thy hiding place?". In verse 7 the Lord responds "My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over thy foes."

As I heard those words my kaleidoscope shifted giving me a clearer understanding of our "seven years of famine" in the 80's and I realized how to begin the writing process about our experiences in those years. I remember telling a friend once that it seemed God had left us on our own for a time because there had been so many difficult things. It is amazing what can happen when your perspective changes to be more correct.

My mind is always working behind the scenes. I suppose that is necessary for me.

Just last week my sister returned to Toronto after spending a month in Utah with me. I was so glad she came even if we did not get as much family history done as we had at first hoped. She helped me shift my paradigm back to working on family history so that I can move forward. With everything going on for a few years I have not been into family history for awhile. Writing my paper on my great great grandparents also helped bring me back into that world.

It is nice to know we still get along. We actually did work on some family history, a bit of organizing, we found a marriage we did not have, she uploaded family pictures to FamilySearch and created some timelines  We spent a lot of 'down time' just reading or watching TV but we also played a little. We drove the Alpine loop in Utah county enjoying the spectacular display of autumn color. We spent time with family including a gathering of about 30 people including my children, our brother and his family and our cousins. We drove to southern Utah and took in the majestic sights of Zions National Park and the amazing formations in Bryce Canyon. I had never been there and it was awesome!

I am still moving slower than I wish. My plantar fasciitis  is about 85% healed but I am struggling with walking very much. After some doctor visits it has been determined that I have Spondylolisthesis  which is causing some issues with my legs and lower back. It sounds like I will need some back surgery to fuse L4 and L5 but that scares me.  Right now I have a LOT of  exercises from the physical therapist so we will see how it goes. Next spring/summer is very full with plans and trips so I could not possibly consider surgery until July. I guess I just need more info before I make a decision, and lots of exercises.

This evening one of our sons and his family came to visit and then our daughter and her family dropped by. It is so nice to be surrounded by those I love and who appear to love me. It has truly been an interesting day!

In a few days another daughter and her family from Colorado will visit for Thanksgiving. I feel very blessed to have such a wonderful family. I miss Steve and his hugs and his foot rubs. I am grateful for my many blessings, especially the Plan of Salvation which teaches that we can be together forever.

                                                           Alpine Loop

                                                 at Snowbird after Oktoberfest.

My sister, my cousin, me and my brother.

                                                    Some of us at a family gathering.

                                       Beautiful skies in southern Utah.

                                                      Zion's National Park

                                                          Bryce Canyon

AH YES OPPOSITION IS VERY REAL!

August Sunset in Syracuse.

 I have been struggling with opposition. While I was in Canada I felt like I had broken through an emotional barrier and was prepared to move forward. I was excited to 'get on with my life'. I was tired after our long trek through the Canadian Provinces and it was good to be home. After a couple of weeks I joined some other widows in our area on a fun trip to San Diego.

It was on my way home when I began to feel ill. At first I worried about Covid but took two at home tests that were both negative. Then after another  week of not feeling well. I finally went to see the doctor. Of course they tested me and I was positive for Covid. Now I don't know if the other tests were defective or if Covid developed long the way. The doctor prescribed some medication to "keep me out of the hospital" and I began to improve almost immediately. However I also discovered that I had  some urinary tract issues and was given 2 other medications, all of  that along with the plantar fasciitis which made it hard for me to walk. I am improving  but  I have no idea how long it will take me to get my strength back. Although I still feel like the emotional fog has lifted as mentioned in my last post, I feel like I am being held back physically.

Even the smallest amount of activity leaves me wiped out. And it is very hard to stay motivated when I am exhausted and wiped out. So, I have been suffering with lots of of opposition.

So, what it opposition? For me it feeling like I cannot move forward in my chosen direction because of the  road blocks in my way. Even though I alphabetized my credenza I have hardly had enough energy to organize papers into  files. I find myself only able to work with a few items per day. I will have made some progress  before my sister arrives this Sunday but there is still so much to do.  I can do only a fraction of what I used to which is frustrating.

I suppose I have been feeling sorry for myself but then I remember that we need opposition to help us grow. I read over Nephi's words in 2 Nephi chapter 2, in particular verse 11.

11 For it must needs be, that there is an ^aopposition in all things. If not so, my firstborn in the wilderness, righteousness could not be brought to pass, neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad. Wherefore, all things must needs be a compound in one; wherefore, if it should be one body it must needs remain as dead, having no life neither death, nor corruption nor incorruption, happiness nor misery, neither sense nor insensibility.

That whole chapter [in the Book of Mormon] is worth reading but that particular verse reminds me that I need to experience opposition in my life to grow. Not having energy to physically do much is very frustrating and yet it has given me a good opportunity for reflection and pondering. I have read several "fluff" books and watched several TV programs and even played games on my phone which have become rather boring. But in the background my mind has been working full time.

I realized that during my whole life I have been a "Martha" worrying  about all the "things" that needed doing. I have rarely taken time to enjoy the moment but instead have been worried about how to facilitate what needed to come next. Maybe that is what comes from having many children to manage but I know that it has meant that I have missed enjoying special moments because I worried about other things. And I grieve for the loss of those special moments. I grieve for the times when I allowed myself to be "too busy" or preoccupied with life to be in the moment with a child or grandchild. And I missed special moments with them. Coming face to face with another  shortcoming is humbling to say the least.

So, now at 75 years old,  I need to switch gears and learn to enjoy and cultivate the moments. I cannot redeem the lost moments but I can do my best to BE HERE in the future. With understanding comes growth. And I am trying to grow.

Last week I attended the first of 8 weeks of a creative writing class. It was good to be there and I feel anxious to learn. It will be a challenge but I am excited about it. I will postpone the art class for a few weeks so I can spend time with my sister. But I have been watching a program on BYUTV called Artful that has taught me much. Each program features 2 artists and it has been very insightful  not only to see their work but to hear their thoughts. I feel like all of these experiences are stretching me.

After Steve died I felt like I needed more time on this earth to learn more.  And I still believe that. I realize that there are still long conversations to be had with Heavenly Father so I can come to understand better what He wants and needs me to do. I am grateful for the increased understanding that is coming my way.

THE FOG IS LIFTING

 I woke up Sunday morning without the fog in my mind. It has been there for so long I could immediately tell it was gone. I felt alive and even enthusiastic about moving forward.

It appears I am actually over Covid! Yeah!  So grateful for good medications. That Paxlovid prescription was very effective. Just hope I can have all of this behind me and gain my strength back soon. Although I still missed Church I had one of my more meaningful Sabbath day experiences as I watched a few programs on BYU TV that caused me to go even deeper in my ponderings. I am grateful for Zoom technology that allowed me to watch my granddaughter and daughter give talks in their ward in Colorado. And also to view my own ward here in Utah. However I am looking forward to actually attending church next week when I hope to be stronger. It will be Stake Conference.

Although my thoughts and feelings are running deep it is difficult to find the correct words to express what I am feeling. And I am hesitant to post this entry because it is so very personal.

September is already here and yet I am still waiting for summer to come. It is impossible to realize that the summer has passed and that my long awaited trip to Canada with my sister has come and passed into memory. I have amazing memories of our time together  but somehow I am still waiting for summer to come and it is strange to see the zinnias in my little garden show signs of fall.

Over the course of our vacation, the many talks with my sister and so much beautiful nature in front of me, I felt my heart loosen up and I was finally  able to cry. I have always been an emotional person but after Steve died it seemed I bottled it all up. It was good to cry again because I knew I needed to but I find it annoying that I cry so frequently now, especially during none emotional events - like walking in a gift shop.  That loosening also helped open some of my creative juices again. I began to feel like I could do things again. 

Actually I have come to realize that  I have held my self in check for many years due to various circumstances. All of my emotions have been bottled up culminating with Steve's death. As a result I have felt it impossible to work on my family history, to read certain passages of scripture or even to watch some general conference talks because doing that brought me closer to emotion I was afraid to express. I began to wonder and worry a little that I was losing my testimony. But as I have loosened up I realize that I held so many  things in check for a long time to protect myself and my testimony is doing fine.

As the day progressed it occurred to me that I have never really allowed myself to grieve over several things and that I just held myself closer and closer in check to prevent  myself from falling apart. I began to reflect on  the things that have happened that caused grief but which I tried not to deal with. Over the years there have been several major events that I have avoided and not allowed myself to grieve.

Originally I had listed those events but I decided it would not be appropriate to include in this blog as they are too personal and ofttimes have included other people. So,  I deleted them.

The loss of identity and self confidence from these events  combined have caused me to doubt my worth and abilities.

With each event I had to maintain control because I was in charge of a family who needed my care and/or there were others who depended on me. Although I wept from time to time I was not able to really grieve. The totality of it all caused me to retreat inside of myself. Over the years I became less open with Steve and I know he felt that loss.

It is understandable but not OK that I have held things inside. It was good to let the tears come, and they keep coming. I realize I need to properly grieve each event before I can move forward. And now that I realize the need I am working on it. As I examine each event I have to put them in their correct place which is in the past. As I am able to do that I feel lighter and more free.

It was a good day on Sunday though, because I was actually able to alphabetize the files in my credenza. That does not sound like a big deal but since they are mostly family history files it is a big deal. It is now done and will allow me a place to sort things I have been unable to file for several years.

I also have begun to have thoughts of things I want to do, like find a way to release my desires to be artistic that are hidden deep inside. I also want to write. I just hope I will have enough courage to move ahead in that way. Next week I plan to begin an art class. We will see how that goes.

The organizing is ongoing. I work at it until I start to 'short out' and then I stop and go read or watch TV. I saw a quote that I like. "We tend to forget that baby steps still move us forward" And some days it is all I can do to sort 3 items. But it is 3 items that are now sorted.

So, as the fog lifts and I see more clearly my path forward I am grateful for baby steps and hope.

 Beach at Lincoln City, Oregon 2013

GIRLS TRIP TO SAN DIEGO - AUGUST 25-29

You have to admit that 8 ‘old ladies’ taking a girls trip to San Diego is bound to be fraught with humor. And we had some funny moments.  But there we were. We are all widows ranging in age from 64-85. We have all had difficulties in our lives that have stretched us. And it was my privilege to be invited on this trip to associate with these outstanding women.

We successfully navigated shuttles, airports and a rental van to arrive at a wonderful penthouse on Mission Beach. Unfortunately our 15 passenger van was unwieldy and got scraped going into a very small parking space. After that experience several of us were on hand to guide our driver in and out of that tiny space. We drew numbers for our rooms and I was in a great room with a great roommate. We could look right out over the beach. What fun  it was to see the dolphins and the brown pelicans. And the sunsets were beautiful!

Our windows were open all of the time so we could enjoy the ocean breezes and the roaring waves. I have now set my Alexa to play ocean sounds here at home and I love it.

Although the beach was the main draw we also took some day trips to Seaport Village, a view  from the 40th floor of the Hyatt and a harbor cruise, Old Town, Coronado Island and a quick swing by the beautiful San Diego Temple of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. We ate out once a day with our other meals and snacking from purchases  at the grocery store and a delivered pizza. Of course we had too much food and should have shared our meals when we went out. But all in all the food worked out great. We played some games but mostly we were too tired from our activities to stay up very late.

My plantar fasciitis prevented me from walking on the beach as I love to do. And my blood sugars both high and low caused me to rest and miss some beach and visiting time. I was so grateful for the use of a wheel chair in the airports and for those sweet ladies who pushed me. I am grateful that I am not permanently disabled and confined to a wheel chair. But some good Chaco sandals and some exercises are helping my foot to feel better and I hope I will  soon be back in gear because there is  much I want to do and I have a hard time being productive if I hurt.

It was good to go and good to come back home but it was also bittersweet as I really wanted to share my experiences with Steve who of course is not here. But I am filled with gratitude for this time with new friends and the beauties we experienced.

A great place to eat lunch. Good company and a fantastic view of the beach.

The view from our balcony. It was fun to watch the parade of people passing by. One evening there was even a bicycle parade with the bikes decorated with colored lights.

One view from the 40th floor of the Hyatt

A sailboat in the distance.

Art Installation at the San Diego airport created with taillights. I think it looks like a school of fish.

Our first lunch right by the water's edge!

Just before our harbor cruise. It was hot sitting on the boat in the sun so we chose to not continue for the  2nd hour. Steve would really have enjoyed the ships and planes we saw.

I MADE IT SAFELY HOME -REFLECTIONS OF OUR TRIP [JUNE 26-AUGUST 10, 2022]

My Sister is a numbers person and pulled together some interesting facts as well as creating this basic map of our travels. Sorry the photos is not great but at least there is the basic.

I have been home for 3 days and strangely our trip already seems like a dream. But we really did make the trip. I left home June 26 and returned August 10. We travelled by air, train and car. I flew 3300 miles/5310 kilometers from Salt Lake to Toronto and back. Together we drove 5500 km/3400 miles, took the train 1000 km/620 miles, took ferries 750 km/465 miles, flew from Halifax to Toronto 1265 km/785 miles, and walked over 300,000 steps, according to her Fitbit, for 250 km/155 miles. We slept in 20 different beds which were mostly pretty comfortable and had 5 days of rainy weather, a day of fog and enjoyed 38 days of travel together. We enjoyed amazing skyscapes, landscapes and waterscapes in mostly sunny weather. I also spent a few days in Toronto on each end since we did not know what challenges Covid may have presented.

Our trip came about accidentally one day when Sue and I were talking on the phone. Shortly after Steve died had I noticed a facebook post from the railway in Canada advertising  a trip across Canada and remember thinking that it would be cool to see Canada that way. When our family immigrated from Denmark in 1951 we travelled by train from Halifax to Kelsey, Alberta where my father would work.

Also, I had an opportunity to take a train trip from Red Deer, Alberta to Portland, Oregon to spend the summer of my 16th year with my grandparents.  It was a great trip with meal tickets to the dining car and sleeping berth that the porter made up at night - it was fun and I felt so grown up.

 So, I was game to take a railroad trip and when I brought it up to Sue, she thought it sounded good too. But then we realized it was very expensive and that we would be sleeping a lot of the way so discarded the thought. But it was the catalyst for talking about taking a trip together. She had always wanted to go to Newfoundland and see the other Maritime provinces. [We have learned that they are all actually called the Atlantic provinces if Newfoundland is included.]

Soon the idea of taking a trip became a working plan. I rented a car through Costco in July of 2021 just in case because I know that the prices only go up the closer to the departure date. It was a safe bet because I could always cancel without paying anything. Then Sue began her amazing research of all the interesting places we could see. I did not have the emotional band width to plan as it was still hard for me to deal with my new reality of losing Steve. But I could agree with the things she wanted to see and add a few of my own wishes, like seeing Niagara Falls. Our trip morphed into reality as I made our reservations for places to stay and she continued to find interesting things for us to see. I bought my return plane ticket to Toronto allowing a few days on  either side of the schedule since we did not know how Covid would be by the time we wanted to travel.

I bought clothes that would be needed like a raincoat, etc. Sue found out about some mosquito and tick repellant pants which we both wanted. I bought hiking shoes and trekking poles anticipating much walking and hiking. And soon an amazing trip was planned complete with reservations.

When I flew to Toronto our trip became a reality. It has been a journey of adventure and self discovery. It has been great  to get to know my sister, who is 7 years younger then I am. We have laughed and cried as we have talked about old family memories. I have cried the most as I finally have been able to cry which I could not for such a long time after Steve’s death. Now I find tears come often and not always conveniently. I am grateful for our time and the increased understanding we have gained of each other. I figured  spending that much time together 24/7 would either bring us closer together or the opposite. I am happy to say that we did not have harsh words and although a couple of times we were ‘hangry’ that was quickly resolved with food. And she is still planning to come and spend a month with me working on family history.

It has become more of a reality that I am alone, without Steve, and although I still miss him and there are painful moments I find I am OK. I can’t even imagine ever wanting to remarry. I am grateful for the 54 years, 4 months and 19 days I was able to be with Steve. He was the best thing that ever happened to me and the love of my life. I am grateful for our lovely family of 10 children and their families. Our posterity, including in-law children, grandchildren, great grandchildren and bonus grandchildren adds up to 78 people. Who could even have imagined that result when Steve and I married so many years ago. I am grateful for the Gospel of Jesus Christ and the Plan of Salvation which give me the knowledge that I can be with Steve and my family again in the next life. The Gospel is the foundation of my life.

Our children bring me great happiness and joy. Their consideration and care for me brings me comfort. I am proud of them and their families. But I know that they do have their own lives and I cannot rely on them for my emotional strength. So, I know that I must strike out on my own so to speak.  I need to develop my own independent life. I look forward to traveling with my grandchildren. It is my hope and my plan to take each of them on a trip. I love them all so dearly and look forward to additional bonding time. I also look forward to spending time with my children.

My creative juices are beginning to flow again. I look forward to projects I can continue or begin. It has always been my desire to learn to ‘throw a pot’ so I hope I can find a ceramic class to attend. I would like to write a book about my great grandparents and their tragic story. I want to take a writing class to help me with that project. And I want to mat and reframe a lot of family pictures and even print and hang some of my many photos from my various trips over the years.

There are many options and I am grateful. I am also grateful for this time of being away and of having various epiphanies about me and my life. They have not always been comfortable epiphanies but it has been good for me.

When I attended church in Toronto I accidentally ended up in a Spanish speaking ward service. It was good to be there to feel the Spirit and to partake of the Sacrament but I could only understand about every 5th word of what was said. I realized as I was sitting there  that my pride has prevented me from learning Spanish. We lived on the Mexican border in Nogales and in Los Fresnos for almost 20 years. I did take a Spanish class in Nogales and learned a little along the way but did not make a real effort to learn. And now I realize how ridiculous it was to avoid learning Spanish just because I felt like it should not be necessary to speak Spanish in this English speaking country. To be fair I was more interested in learning Danish and German because  of the family history research I was doing. But nonetheless I avoided learning Spanish  and I have had to repent from that. My life could have been so much more enriched. I know I could have served the Lord so much better and been helpful to more people if I had been less prideful and learned Spanish. And it was uncomfortable to be confronted with my own short comings.

I have also had some paradigm shifting as I have continued to meet and observe so many different people. Another of my short comings is being judgmental. Part of this journey of self discovery has been to realize how basically good most people are regardless of how they look or their circumstances. I have lived in my own little bubble for a long time and I have learned that I need to expand my bubble and think differently. Hopefully I can be more repentant in that area as  well.

There have been other glimpses of clarity along the way and I hope for a reset in my life. Now I hope that I will have the momentum to move forward in positive ways. But I am tired and it will take me a few days to get back in gear.

Unfortunately I have learned that I have plantar fasciitis in my right foot which is why I struggled so much with my heel hurting. By the time I got to Salt Lake after almost running through the very large Minneapolis airport and still missing my connection [due to a mechanical issue with my earlier plane] my foot was very painful and I could hardly walk.  Thankfully I was able to have a wheel chair from my gate to the curbside. I have also learned that it is hard to feel motivated when I am in pain. Hopefully I will be able to get this ailment behind me asap so I can move forward in my life.

Our trip, The Canada East Coast Swing as my sister called it, was totally amazing. We saw so many things that I became almost ‘full up’ with beauty. We met and spoke with so many lovely people. We learned so much and because of our new knowledge we have become slightly different people. We learned new words and phrases like: youse, gets, thanks honey [or my darlin’] etc. I had to buy another suitcase to hold all the things I found at gift shops. I really do enjoy looking in gift shops and it was fun to find cute ear rings for the females of my posterity.

Our expenses actually came in under budget and it was also helpful that the railroad gave us a 25% refund due to the toilets being knocked out after hitting the moose. Delta Airlines also gave me 10,000 air miles to compensate for cancelling my original non-stop flight to Toronto.

The largest portion of our time was spent in Newfoundland which is called ‘the Rock’ because of all the rocks. There are rocks everywhere! And they are awesome. I cannot fully explain all we saw and experiences. The ‘Newfies’ are a warm and hospitable people. They knit and quilt probably a lot over the cold winters. We really did not do justice to the other provinces but what we did see and do was amazing.  

Although we had hoped to have seen icebergs they just were not available. We also thought we would see moose and caribou and puffins but we did not. It is sad that our only encounter with a moose was when our train hit a moose. We saw so many signs telling us to beware of moose and to report any incidents. We heard so many stories of moose encounters but we never did see a moose! Everyone we spoke to told us we should feel lucky that we did not have the experience of being charged by a moose.

And now it is up to me. It felt a little empty when I got home and the house seemed so big. It is Sunday today and I am looking forward to getting back to church services in my own ward. I look forward to building new friendships and to spending more time with my family. I am grateful for my life.

DAY 35- 38 --HALIFAX, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME, IMMIGRATION MUSEUM AND TOURIST STUFF [August 3 -6]

 The Immigration Museum at Pier 21 had been on my bucket list since we began planning our trip. When I was 3 years old my father, mother my baby sister and I passed through the Port of Halifax when we came from Denmark. Even though I knew about it I wanted to see if there was anything there that would be evidence that we had come.

Since we were carless we took an Uber to the museum. I am so glad we went! We began with a tour which explained a lot about the procedure of the day. After being processed and found to be healthy and legal the newcomers went immediately to the train which was right by the pier. There was a train car like the one we would have used on our trip across Canada. It cost $7.00 per family to make that trip and each family had to provide their own bedding and food. We had a long trip from Halifax to Edmonton, Alberta and then on to Camrose, and then to Kelsey, Alberta where we were met by Errol and Edith Fox who owned the farm where my father was to work. It probably took several days which would have been hard on basic seats with small children.

I was again amazed at the courage of my parents who were so young - my father, 28, and my mother only 23. I was 3 years old, my sister only 6 months old. The trip on the ocean liner was hard on them as they suffered from sea sickness, barely able to care for my sister. I ran all over the ship and played with other children. I am very grateful to them for their sacrifices.

My mother was always so organized and I am sure she was even back then. I remember her telling me that when they packed they took one blanket for each person, one fork, one knife, one spoon, etc. My father, who was very handy, had built a box for my sister which held her and, I presume, her supplies. He had also built boxes for our belongings which of course went with the luggage. And there were some brown suitcases. Although my mother had a good understanding of English since she had been studious in school, my father did not know more that the basics.  I actually remember sitting around the dinner table in Denmark trying to learn new English words. The word that sticks in my mind was ‘fork’ and it sounded like such a strange word to use instead of ‘gaffel’.

There is a family search centre right in the museum. We waited our turn and in a matter of minutes we had a copy of the manifest from Plymouth, England from April 1951 showing our family. My name and my father’s name were misspelled but it is us. We also received  some information about the ship Europa on which we sailed.

We spoke a long time with a very helpful young man from the Canada Archives who was trying to find out the name of the program which  allowed our family to come. My father had to commit to work for a year on a farm to be allowed to live in Canada and eventually apply for citizenship. Sadly, he was unable to find out the name of the program which seems strange to me. Maybe someday I will learn more about it. But suffice it to say there was a program and we did come and my father did work on a farm in Kelsey, Alberta for the required time. 

It was Gunnar not Gurnar and Lizzi not Lizze.

No specific memories of the train ride although my parents told me that I was able to recognize and name the various crops we passed on our way - like wheat, oats, etc

I cannot even imagine how hard this trip was for so many.

I debated including this photo since I look so strange. But here I am in front of the train car exhibit.

It was my birthday and I was glad to be there on that day. I was given a gold sticker at the museum which was reserved for Alumni visiting the museum. 

So, this is what 75 looks like. I don’t even know what that means but I have been very blessed  in my life. My sister says I do not look 75 but that I move like I am 75. Not sure how to respond to that.

Because my leg/heel was so painful and I felt exhausted, I was ready to Uber back to the motel. But my sister was so disappointed that I decided to try to walk a little further. I am glad that I did because as we moved along the boardwalk at a slow pace my leg began to loosen up and  we were able to enjoy the breeze off the harbor and sit from time to time in the benches along the way. It was very pleasant to sit and listen to the sounds, feel the sun and the breeze and just enjoy life.

Sue took me for a Lobster dinner for my birthday. I had never had a lobster dinner so that was fun.

No she did not eat it that way!

Just fun!!

I took a photo of these hostas because we saw so many. They must grow well in the climate here. There were also many with purple blossoms.

There is a Public Garden a few hilly blocks from our hotel and we decided to check it out figuring that if it go to be too much for me to walk that we could get an Uber. But I made it and we spent several hours in the park enjoying the trees, bushes and flowers. It is a Victorian park. We loved it and took a lot of photos of course. Then we stopped at a restaurant for some early dinner before walking back to the motel which was mostly downhill and doable.

Waiting for our early dinner and yes, I was tired!

Friday was our final day in Halifax for sight seeing. We had decided to take a tour with the Harbour Hopper, an amphibious vehicle. It was a little pricey but allowed us to see things we would not have seen if I had been trying to walk.

On our tour we saw a street that appeared to be lined with shops. We walked uphill for several blocks and when we finally got there, there were hardly any shops at all. We walked on to the Art Gallery where we saw the works of Maude Lewis. Her story is incredible as she painted with severe rheumatoid arthritis but managed to earn a living with her art. 

The Harbour Hopper was great! We got to ride around town and see lots of sights and then we drove down a ramp and the vehicle became a boat which took us around the harbor

We wanted to visit this shop but they would not let more people in because they had reached their Covid limit. Not wanting to wait in line in the heat we moved on.

The Citadel was high up on a hill for defense purposes. The top was grassy and before it became a national historic site, the grass in front of a trench was not mowed so it looked like a continuous grassy hill.

At the Citadel.

Red Sky at night promising good weather for our flight back to Toronto 

And then it was over. We shuttled to the airport to catch our WestJet flight to Toronto. Somehow the passenger count was off and while the crew tried to figure it out the ground crew loading our luggage moved to help someone else. It was the ONLY ground crew so by the time our passenger count issue had been resolved there was no crew to load our luggage which delayed us over an hour and then there was another hour delay in getting our luggage from the plane. But we did get all of our luggage including the 2nd suitcase I had to buy for all the stuff I bought. It was a long wait for Sue’s friend who came to pick us up. But we made it! And now it seems like a dream.