Finding My Way Forward: February 2023

Several years ago Steve and I spend 4 1/2 months in Wales to research his family history. We stayed in a small village called Pontygwaith and often drove to the Glamorgan Archive in Cardiff or the West Glamorgan Archive in Swansea with occasional forays to the archives in Neath, Cowbridge, etc. We also spent some time in Aberystwyth at the National Archives. How we loved immersing ourselves in the old records! It was a thrill to touch and read the old documents. And we found some amazing information.

The countryside of Wales is so lovely with many enclosed green fields dotted with sheep. I loved to see them. It is so very green and just beautiful! One day I wanted to stop and take some pictures of sheep so I pulled off to the side of the road , got out of the car and walked across the road because there were a lot of sheep in the back field. Steve wasn't as excited about the sheep as I was so he patiently waited in the car.

There was a wide metal gate sitting diagonally at the corner of the field. As I walked up to that gate the sheep at the extreme opposite end of the field saw me and started running my direction! Then it seemed they got shy and stopped so I moved and turned just a little and they then began to run again. I have wondered if they hoped I had a treat for them, just didn't know what they were thinking.

Over the next 10 or so minutes they alternated between running towards me and acting shy. The more bashful sheep stayed somewhere near the middle of the field. But several continued to press forward. Eventually only 3 stuck their heads through the rungs while others milled around. Oh how I laughed at their antics.

I immediately learned two things. The sheep were not really all that cute up close. AND they smelled awful!!! I did not even dare pet them because they smelled so gross. I contented myself with taking a few photos and apologized for not bringing a treat. Then I crossed the road, walked back to the car chuckling all the way and drove back home to Pontygwaith. The sheep waited a bit and then gradually moved back into the field. If I had brought a treat for them it might have been even more fun.

It was a very funny experience for me and for some reason I told one of my daughters about it the other day. She reminded me of the many pictures we see of the Savior carrying a lamb. Then she drew the analogy between us and those sheep and how the Savior is always there, willing to pick us up no matter how much we stink.

The more I thought about what she said the more I realized how profound she was. We spend our whole lives getting dirty and smelly, catching ourselves on the difficult experiences and debris of the world. But always the Savior is there to love us, to pick us up, to clean us off through forgiveness and help us come 'home'. Likely the sheep the Savior held did not stink nor will we when we turn to Him.

[I wanted to add a photo of the Savior holding lamb but it seems copyright law prohibits me from doing so. But I am sure you can see one in your mind 😌]

Lots of photo ops in the Cabo market place.

Going on a cruise was a fun experience. Going on the RENEW23 Cruise was a phenomenal experience! It was so great to spend time with my eldest daughter enjoying things we like to do. The whole ship had been chartered for this group for a 5 night cruise starting in Long Beach traveling to Cabo San Lucas, Ensanada and back to Long Beach. I loved having a balcony room so we could enjoy the ocean and the views. It was great to see dolphins and whales along our way.

The bars and the casino were not busy since no one was interested in the alcohol or gambling. By the last 2 evenings the bar tenders had figured out how to offer non alcoholic beverages so we saw a lot of virgin pina coladas, etc being served and the staff had opportunities to earn tips. On a humorous note, which we did not even notice until a couple of days in, several of the plentiful naked statues had been given 'togas'.

The musical offerings were pretty awesome. We enjoyed concerts by the Piano Guys, Conlon Bonner, Ofi, David Osmond, the Osmond Chapman Orchestra, Hilary Weeks. There were also a number of interesting presentations by various people but we just did not have enough time to enjoy them all. But they all followed a theme of spiritual/emotional survival, of getting back up again after tough times, of hope, of renewal. One of the speakers mentioned "sacred idleness" - a time to just be and allow ourselves to renew instead of being constantly busy. A time to ponder and refresh. That is important for me to remember.

I was cleared by my doctor to go on the cruise but not to go on excursions. I wore the back brace every day and used a walker when we were not on the ship. It was nice to just sit down on the walker seat when I got tired. Tracking my steps showed me that I walked between 1 and 2 miles per day without even leaving the ship. Our stateroom was about in the middle of the ship so we had to go one direction for our meals and another for our concerts. But medically it was a great break half way through my recovery and the walking was good to loosen me up. There was too much food of course. But I was not overly impressed with it or maybe there was just too much. And I did not gain any weight which was great!

It is always fun to visit markets. I forgot to take photos but it was fun to see all the color. I found a very cute little Mexican shirt for my newest great grandson who will be born in May, as well as a very cute little 2 piece dress for the newest great granddaughter who will be born in March. It is pretty amazing to realize that I will soon have 13 great grandchildren! I am so blessed!

Next January RENEW24 will occur and I hope to participate and get that extra shot in the arm again. I just hope the weather cooperates a little better as my daughter had a hard time getting home with storms in the midwest which cancelled and delayed her flights into Nashville.

Now I am home in COLD Utah. And it has been COOOLDD! Well below freezing for a long time with occasional snow.

It was strange coming home - to reality I suppose- and seeing that my house still looks the same and trying to again figure out "what comes next".

As I looked toward my future trips I realized it was time to make sure my grandsons and I have our proper immunizations for our trips to France and Kenya and Tanzania. I have absolutely no idea where I put the record of my immunizations! Of course I have my Covid shot records with my passport but I looked HARD and cannot find the other records.

Tender mercies are very real. After my initial panic, and some prayer, I made a series of phone calls culminating with a fortuitous call to the Whatcom County WA Health department. The lovely person I spoke with sent me link for a form which I printed and filled out, my daughter helped me to get a photo of the form sent back and literally within 10 minutes on a Friday afternoon I electronically received the whole list of my immunizations including all I was given in 2016/2017 preparing for our mission to Australia. What a relief and a HUGE shout out to the staff at Whatcom County Health department! I have an appointment Thursday to see my doctor and hopefully get his approval for a Yellow Fever Immunization. I need that "note from my doctor" since I am over 60. Then Friday I will get the Yellow Fever vaccine and anything else I still need. Hopefully the side affects are not too awful.

On Saturday my son came and picked me up and drove me to Salt Lake to see the final performance of my grandson with the Young Ambassadors. He pays a mean guitar and has spent 2 years with that group but he is now finished. It was such fun to be there to watch the performance and to watch my grandson jiving to the music. And it was so nice to have my son be my chauffeur and have that precious time to just visit. Steve would be really glad to see how nicely our children care for me.

Taxes are a royal PAIN. I did mine the other night and discovered I have to pay this year. I guess that is not a huge surprise since I did not have any funds withheld in 2022. But what was a surprise was that along with the taxes I rightfully owe I am being charged $57 for not having had enough funds withheld. How is that fair????? Well Uncle Sam will get my taxes and my fee - but not until April 14. And I will have to go in and change my withholding statement so that next year I will not be charged for not taking enough out. Ridiculous! GRRRR

The days seem to flow by. I actually dared go to church on Sunday - the first since my surgery in mid December. It was good to be there and not just watch on Zoom. Nice also to know that people were glad to see me and were concerned for me since my surgery.

Still reading a lot of books. It is sad when I find an author I really enjoy and then have read all of her books. [I have really enjoyed the historical novels, mostly with a romance, written by Roseanna M White. She writes good clean stories with intricate plots.] Then I have to find a new author. I'm also watching a lot of TV offerings. It is easy to hide myself away in books or TV shows and not quite face life. I need to work on a schedule to make sure I am doing the things I need to do. It is just much easier to hide. But I need to try to figure out things to do for other people.

I need to NOT hide but to get on with a purpose in my life. I am still going to grief counseling Not sure just how long I will need that but it seems to help. Tears of loss still come at the strangest times but I feel very blessed and look forward to the future. I just have to figure out how to manage that future :)

The monitor in our room showed our progress and other details. From Long Beach to Cabo San Lucas to Ensenada and back to Long Beach. The weather was pleasant.

I did not take as many photos as I should have. My daughter took a lot and some of these are hers. I hope next time I travel that my head will be more in gear to find and take the great photos that are available. I really am a greedy traveller and want to see and absorb everything! And I love nature! So, a few pictures.